Monday, January 31, 2011

It Was Time

Last week I mentioned this is big monumental birthday I had late last year.  This big day brings about certain discoveries for many, and I’m no different.  Aside from the folds (remember those?!), I’ve realized that I no longer have the bounce back I used to (whether it’s recovering from a boozy night or training for a 10km), I’ll never win an Oscar and … I need a mammogram.

This probably isn’t where you thought I was going, so I’ll make my observations quick (just like my mammogram, which took all of 7 minutes) and painless (not just like my mammogram, which still took all of 7 minutes):

I kneed bread more gently;
At the clinic my breasts are not breasts or boobs or a chest they are ... fatty tissue;
I’m pretty sure if my fatty tissues were bigger it wouldn’t have been so uncomfortable and awkward and ouchy.  (Ah, the irony).
There must be a better way;
I kneed bread more gently (yes, I know I said this already but honestly.  HONESTLY a person is attached to those!).

The good news is, my fatty tissues, according to the thankfully upbeat lab technician, are “textbook”.  For some odd reason, I found that observation quite complimentary on many levels.

Anyway - yeay! I love being medically boring.

And, still, ouch.  But, really - Yeay for ouchy boring!

What’s next?  I’m ready.

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